Author’s note: This post is the prequel to my previous post Blog: A Random Love Letter, And The Moon. Let me show you how freakin’ amazing it feels to be free from heartache.
Words left unsaid.
I don’t know why I still think about you or even attempt to talk to you. I don’t know why you’re still in my fucking head when all you do is hurt me (unintentionally). It hurts every time I think about you, coz no matter how hard I pretend that I’ve already moved on, you’re still there. Maybe what pisses me off is how nonchalant you act every time or maybe it’s just me expecting too much. Maybe this is me hoping that in some alternate universe, we’ll still end up together. I really don’t know.
I don’t know how we ended. Seems like ages ago, but the wounds are still fresh. I just woke up one day, and you were gone – totally checked out of my life. God knows how hard I tried to make you stay, but you were just too fucking oblivious and numb to feel my presence in your life. In my heart I knew I loved you, and I tried hard to convince myself that you loved me back. I gave you my soul, if that wasn’t enough for you, forgive me. But I gave you everything that I could, and you were just too fucking sad to feel my presence in your life.
I hope one day we get to talk about what happened to us, what I did wrong. Just for one day, stop pretending. I just don’t want to be left hanging anymore. I know your life is none of my business now, but you still have a part of my heart and I need it back as soon as possible, because honestly, I want to live again and I haven’t done that since the day you left me for her.